


Nothing Hetero Here

by just_plain_fanfics



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining Idiots, keith's gaydar is broken, lance is definitely not straight, obviously, what else can you expect from these dorks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-15
Updated: 2017-05-15
Packaged: 2018-10-31 22:30:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10908765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_plain_fanfics/pseuds/just_plain_fanfics
Summary: Keith thinks Lance is straight, Lance finds out Keith has a crush and knowing this ends up distracting him from everything else, chaos ensues.





	Nothing Hetero Here

**Author's Note:**

> Ahaha, there is no way my boy Lance is straight.

Keith had had enough. Maybe it was his jealously talking, but he was sick of Lance’s flirting. After said boy had spent an entire diplomatic mission flirting with the alien girls from the planet instead of helping with the mission, Keith decided to talk to him. His stupid straight flirting antics were driving Keith mad.

“Goddammit Lance! Your stupid heterosexual fantasies are getting annoying!” Keith snaps. Whether from jealously or desperation. He had accepted Lance’s sexuality a while back, but he was still disappointed. Someone snickers. Keith whips his head around, and is faced with a giggling Pidge and Hunk, who is trying to hold his laughter in. Finally Hunk burst.

“H-heterosexual? Y-you think Lance- You think Lance is straight?!” Hunk exclaims, while Keith just stands there, confused.

“Uh, I guess?” Keith cocks his head, staring inquisitively at the others.

“Oh my god.” Pidge breaths, doubled over laughing.

“What?” Keith asks, defensively. He crosses his arms and huffs, pouting.

“Keith, buddy, my man. Your gaydar is way off.” Hunk says, grinning. Pidge keels over, set off into another round of laughter. Keith looks over at Lance, a pleading expression on his face. Lance stumbles backwards, sitting onto the bench behind him, laughing.

“Are you going to explain, or…?” Keith asks, quirking an eyebrow.

“Dude. I am the biggest bisexual on the planet. Wait- in the universe, actually.” Lance finally says. Keith stares, mouth forming a perfect “o” shape. He quickly regains his composure, looking back over at the chuckling Cuban boy.

“Well, I guess that explains why he flirts with anything that moves.” Lance gapes. Hunk and Pidge just look at each other and burst into giggles again.

“Oh my god, Lance. He just fucking roasted you.” Pidge snorts, ignoring Hunk’s chastising look for her language use.

“Wow, savage.” This comes from Hunk, and Lance sends a wounded look his way.

“I’m hurt. Hunk, I thought we were friends.” Lance pouts dramatically.

“We are friends, that’s why I make fun of your pain.” Pidge cackles, and Keith finds himself smirking at Hunks comment.

“I’ve only seen you flirt with female aliens though?” Keith questions.

“Yeah, well, none of the dude aliens we’ve met have really been my type.” Lance shrugs.

“You’ll settle for just any girl then?”

“Well I mean- wait! That was totally an insult wasn’t it! I take my flirting very seriously!” Keith just grins smugly.

“Uh-huh, I’m sure. Anyways, I’m gonna head off.”

“Wait! We’re not done here! What about what Hunk said about you! What about your gaydar!” Keith cringes. He doesn’t want to explain to them that the reason he wasn’t hitting on any male aliens was that he has a crush on the very oblivious blue paladin.

“I have the same reasons as you.” Keith responds calmly, but it’s not enough to satisfy Lance.

“Come on! There’s gotta be someone!” Lance prods, smiling devilishly at Keith. The silliness of it made his heart leap.

“Yeah, maybe if he didn’t have such a huge gay space crush.” Hunk whispers to Pidge, unfortunately loud enough for Lance to hear. Keith face falls, and he glances at Lance. Lance almost looks sad for a moment, but Keith disregards the thought.

“I mean, what?” Hunk stutters out, but it’s too late, the damage has been done.

“Ooooh! Keith! Why didn’t you tell me!” Keith huffs, and turns away slightly. All of his instincts were screaming at him to get out of there. He ignores them for now, as he stares at the floor.

“There wasn’t anything to tell.”

“Of course there was! Who is it?!” Lance excitedly asks. Does he really expect to get an answer?

“No one.”

“Keith! Tell me!”

“I said, no one!”

“If you don’t tell me, I’ll have to guess!” That’s when Keith runs. He volts out the door, ignoring the protesting yells of Lance behind him. He escapes to his room, sinking onto the mattress. Why did he have to fall for Lance again? Oh yeah, cause the universe hates him. Whoops, he almost forgot. Keith rolls his eyes at nothing in particular, and grabs his knife. If he’s going stay in his room, he’s not going to just sit idly by. He reaches for the drawer near his bed, opening it to find a scrap of cloth. He runs it over the knife, again and again, letting the familiar feeling calm his nerves. He’ll wait until tomorrow to think about Lance.

He does not wait until tomorrow. Four hours later, and he’s still furiously polishing his knife, dreading what tomorrow will be like. Keith isn’t stupid, he knows Lance won’t let this go. More likely, Lance will use this to drive Keith up the wall even more. What would he think if he knew that he was the one Keith had a crush on? Probably hate Keith even more than he already does. Keith reminds himself that Lance is bisexual, feeling hope bubble up in his chest. He pushes it back down, he can’t let himself think that he possibly has a chance. Keith begins thinking again, which is never a good thing, especially not this late at night. He thinks about Lance, the smile that captured Keith’s heart, the obnoxiously cute laugh that causes him breathing difficulties each and every day. He thinks about the way Lance looks after making a bad joke, his tongue poking out of his mouth, one eye closed in a teasing wink. Keith feels his face heat up, god he’s got it bad. He thinks of Lance’s cheesy pickup line, how he wishes they were directed at him. Keith thinks of the other aliens Lance’s hit on, and a jealous rage builds up in his chest. He takes a breath, he can’t control Lance’s actions, even if they make him want to scream. Keith hates himself for falling for the fool of a person that makes Lance that adorable, he hates himself for it. At two in the morning, Keith accepts that he won’t be getting any sleep.

Keith is not oblivious, well not completely anyways. He can see the quick looks Lance throws at him, feel the pair of eyes on his back. Keith ignores it. Because as well as he isn’t oblivious, he isn’t stupid. So he won’t bite. He will simply ignore the teasing smirks cast his way.

After training, Coran comes by the group with juice pouches. Lance takes two, keeping one and holding the other out for Keith to take.

“Here, you thirsty?” The way he says thirsty makes Keith blush, but he soon covers it up with a scowl.

“Not nearly as much as you.” Keith gives a pointed look to Lance, whose jaw falls open. Hunk and Pidge high-five one another, and Shiro looks dead inside.

—

So Keith likes someone. Alright. Lance is definitely not disappointed. Who is he kidding, Lance is very disappointed, but he keeps his face neutral, and teases Keith about ti to take his mind off of it. He still can’t believe that Keith thought eh was straight. That makes him smile. The he remembers that Keith has a crush on someone that isn’t him. It’s still amazing that Keith actually has feelings for someone. Lance didn’t think it was possible for him to feel anything. Who could be amazing enough to make Keith swoon? They’d have to be some sort of miracle worker. He needed to know.

At break, when Shiro and Allura leave the other four to rest Lance gives another try at getting details out of Keith.

“Sooo. Keithy-boy. You gonna give me details or….?” Keith just snorts, turning his back to face Lance. Wow, rude.

“I thought you said you were gonna guess? Or did you already give up?” A challenge.

“Hmm? Does that mean I’ve met them?” Lance asks, not missing the flinch in Keith’s movements.

“I wouldn’t know.”

“No way. I know them? That makes this easier!” Lance smiles. He silently cheers to himself, now he has a way to narrow it down.

“I didn’t say that!” Keith scowls, glaring at Lance. How did Keith manage to look so good while simultaneously looking so mad? Lance was caught off guard, but soon got his breath back.

“Yeah, but you gave it away!” Keith just sighs.

—

Who could it be? Back in his room, Lance paces. He doesn’t know why he’s so stuck up on this, well, he actually does but he won’t admit it to himself. But it has to be someone he knows. So someone on the ship? Who else did he know that Keith also knows? Suddenly he stops pacing. He could just ask! Lance smiles to himself. He’ll just ask the others. Like Shiro! Wait- what if it’s Shiro? Lance shakes away the thought, it’s not important. He’ll just bring it up casually. He walks out of his room and begins his search for their teams leader.

He runs into Shiro in the control room, bumping into Coran as the older man exits the room.

“Hey Lance, what brings you here?”

“Oh, not much.” A lie. He stands next to Shiro on the platform, folding his arms into his chest.“

"So. Apparently Keith has a crush.” Watching Shiro out of the corner of his eye, Lance is almost disappointed when he doesn’t get a reaction.

“Oh, you noticed then? That’s good for you guys!”

“Well, I mean it was kinda Hunk’s slip-up, but I was wondering if you knew who it was?” Lance asks in a rush, and Shiro looks at him in surprise.

“You don’t know who it is?”

“No, I only know he has one.” A thoughtful look came over Shiro’s face.

“Sorry bud, but I can’t tell you.” Lance pouts.

“Aw, why not?”

“It’s not my secret to tell.” Shiro looks at Lance sternly and Lance sighs. He’ll try asking Keith again tomorrow.

“Okay, well, thanks anyways.”

“Bye Lance.” Shiro smiles as Lance walks back to his room.

Lance falls asleep thinking about Keith. Until four in the morning.

—

The next morning Keith is already awake earlier than he needs to be, so he heads to the training deck. Maybe training can take his mind of Lance. It doesn’t. He blocks the gladiator’s strikes, swiping at the metal figure with his bayard. He’s doing pretty well for a bit, but is soon startled by a familiar voice by the door.

“Hey, Keithy-boy! Dude, why are you even up so early?” Lance’s voice rings throughout the training deck, resounding in the open space. Keith just shrugs, and tries to focus back on training. He lunges at the dummy, just missing the stomach. The dummy counterattacks, and Keith has to leap out of the way to avoid being hit. He doesn’t move back far enough, and the training bot pins him to the floor.

“End training sequence!” The dummy disappears. Keith gets up quickly.

“Wow, Keith getting pinned by the bot? Rare sight.”

“Shut up Lance, it was your fault.” Keith glares at Lance, while picking up his bayard and grabbing a bottle of water.

“My fault? How was that my fault?” Lance asks, incredulous.

“You distracted me!”

“Ohoho, so you find this distracting?” Lance asks, pointing to himself and striking a ridiculous pose.

“You know that’s not what I meant.”

“Are you sure you weren’t distracted by that crush of yours?” If only you knew Lance, if only you knew. Keith sighs. It’s gonna be a long day.

“No.” Keith walks out the door, but not without Lance close at his heels.

“Who is it? Tell meeee!” Lance whines. Keith ignores him as they enter the kitchen, instead making himself a bowl of goo.

“Keeeeeith.” He rolls his eyes, but part of Keith likes the way Lance says his name.

“Okay then! I am going to guess!”

“Suit yourself.” Keith mutters, not even looking up. Then Lance starts mumbling to himself, which he finds cute for some reason. Lance’s face is screwed up in concentration. Keith feels the need to kiss the crinkle between Lance’s eyebrows, but he brushes it off.

“Okay well if I know them too, they’re probably on this ship. He’s also gay, so that lowers the count to, uh, whatever. So!” Lance looks back up at Keith.

“It’s Shiro!” Keith gapes.

“What the fuck?” Keith asks, stressing the last word.

“Well I mean, he is attractive, not to mention you two are close.” Lance nods decidedly to himself.

“No way. Lance he’s basically my brother, so just no.” Keith makes a disgusted face.

“Hmm, not Shiro. So Hunk? Can’t say I blame you, the guy is a real sweetheart.”

“Nah. As much as Hunk is a nice person, he’s not my type at all.” Keith says, pretending to be bored with the game. He’s not actually bored with it, and he does kind of want to see who else Lance will guess. He ignores his anxiety that tells him no, no he should not do this, what will he say if Lance guesses himself?

“I know it isn’t Pidge.” Keith snickers at that and Lance laughs along with him.

“Damn right.”

“Okay then. Coran?” Lance raises his eyebrows at Keith, who lets out an exasperated sigh, dropping his head into his hands.

“No- Just no.” Keith shakes his head. Lance snickers.

“Well if they aren’t on the ship, who else?” Keith head jerks back up in confusion. So Lance wasn’t going to ask about himself? Does he think Keith hates him that much? Or does he not want to make it awkward? Whichever, Keith plays along. Better safe than sorry.

“Probably no one from the Garrison, since you dropped out and all.” Keith finds himself nodding.

“Was it Rolo who captured your heart?” Lance asks, whilst fluttering his eyelashes. He looks ridiculous and Keith can’t help but snort.

“Now you’re just being silly.” Keith says.

“What? It was a good question! He wasn’t that bad, just not my type!”

“Not mine either.” Lance and Keith let out a sigh at the same time, then look at each other. Somehow the sheer strangeness of the two of them sighing at 6 a.m. makes them burst out laughing. Keith actually, genuinely laughs. He keeps laughing until his cheeks hurt, and he has to stop. He notices Lance staring at him and quirks his eyebrows.

“S'there something on my face?” Lance looks away blushing. Weird. Remembering the time, Keith suddenly wonders why Lance is even up right now. Shouldn’t he be sleeping? Keith recalls Lance once saying how early mornings destroy his pores, so why is he up right now, before everyone else?

“By the way, why are you up so early? You’re usually not up til around eight or nine.” Lance visibly gulps, his Adam’s apple moving up and down. Keith feels his face grow hot. Now is not the time.

“I dunno man, I just was.” Keith frowns at the answer. It was obviously a lie.

“Okay well, I’m gonna go take a shower, so seeya.” Keith sees Lance wave as he heads out the door in the direction of his room. Strange.

—

Not Shiro. Not Hunk or Coran or Rolo. He had asked about everyone, minus himself of course, there was no way it was him, so who else? It hadn’t sounded like he was lying when he answered, so who else was there? Lance tries to squish down the small hope that it could be him.

So who did that leave? Shay’s brother? He was a jerk, so that couldn’t be it. Keith was getting friendly with one of the Arusians on their first mission, could that be… no way. This is getting stupid. Lance gives up guessing, but the thought is still prominent in his mind. He’ll ask Keith tomorrow. For now, he’ll just go through the motions of the day and try not to be too distracted.

He is definitely too distracted. Lance glances across the room, eyes flitting over Keith. Hot, as always. Shit. The gladiator he was supposed to be defending himself against takes a swing, bringing it’s sword down onto Lance’s chest. With a yelp, Lance falls to the floor.

“Hey Lance, you okay?” Hunk shouts while narrowly avoiding another dummy.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Get your head in the game. We can’t have you distracted while on a mission.” Shiro scolds, but there’s no malice in his words.

“Yeah, sorry.” Lance says, feeling drained, but he soon perks up again with Shiro’s reassuring smile.

The rest of training passes as uneventful as possible with a distracted blue paladin, and Lance is the first to scurry off when they are dismissed. Lance isn’t any better at dinner. He barely eats any of his food, instead scowling at it in frustration. He doesn’t feel like eating so he just dumps his bowl in the sink. Everyone else has already left, so he may as well turn in early. With that he turns and heads back to his room.

At 1 a.m. he gives up. Lance is probably not getting to sleep tonight, so why try? Instead he pulls himself out of the warmth of his covers and into the hallway. There are a number of reasons he can’t sleep, and puzzling over Keith’s crush only made it harder. Feeling kind of hungry since he didn’t finish his dinner, he heads towards the kitchen.

Thankfully no ones there, so he doesn’t even bother to turn on the light. Instead, he dishes himself some goo and takes a seat. The goo isn’t great, but it does help to fill the seemingly endless pit in his stomach. Grabbing a glass, he gets some water and spoons himself a second helping. He’s got to make up for not sleeping with at least eating properly. Sitting at the bar, Lance takes in the silence of the castle. It’s peaceful, and Lance feels some of the tension ease out of him. He’s always liked being up at night, it gave him a break from the busy life he had back at home. There wouldn’t be any screaming siblings or noisy relatives in the middle of the night. Not to say he doesn’t like his family, because that would be the opposite of true, they were just a bit loud sometimes. And by sometimes he means all the time. The noise isn’t bad, he actually kind of misses it in space. Lance sighs. Glancing at the clock, he reads 1:45 a.m. and sighs again, body slumping.

The silence doesn’t last forever though, especially not when Keith steps through the door with a water bottle in his hand. Lance quickly straightens up in his chair with a squeal, then covers his mouth. He will deny ever making that sound in the future.

“Uh, hey Keith! What brings you here?” Lance brings a hand to the back of his neck, scratching at it nervously. Keith looks at him funny then goes back to filling up the bottle.

“Can’t sleep.” Keith mutters, sitting down heavily on the bar stool across from Lance. He opens his water bottle and takes a swing. Lance swallows nervously. They sit in silence for a few minutes. Lance decides it’s now or never to ask about his crush. Besides, aren’t people more open in the middle of the night?

“Hey Keith, are you every gonna tell me who your crush is?” Keith stares at him blankly. His blank stare may actually be scarier than his normal glare.

“Is this why you’re up?” Lance quirks his eyebrows. That wasn’t the response he expected.

“Well I mean not entirely, there were other reasons too, but then again it was part of it.” Lance rambles on, not noticing the shock on Keith’s face. “But back to the point! Who is it?!” Keith rolls his eyes.

“You still haven’t figured it out? I can’t believe you.” Lance frowns.

“I’ve guessed everyone! So unless you’re lying, I can’t think of anyone else it would be!” Keith groans, dropping his head into his hands.

“You are so dumb.”

“Well sorry I can’t guess your stupid crush.”

—

How can Lance be so dumb? There is literally no one else it could be other than him, so why hasn’t he guessed that yet? He groans again. He really hopes that it isn’t just his crush that’s keeping Lance up. He almost feels guilty. Maybe that’s what makes the next words come out of his mouth.

“Well, they are pretty stupid.” Keith smirks.

“I know there’s a hint there, I just know it. But, I don’t know what it is.”

“Oh my god, they are literally the only other guy on the ship that you haven’t guessed yet!” Keith says, staring at Lance.

“So what, like, the mice?” Keith breathes out what sounds like an ‘oh my god’ and stands up. Leaning across the counter, Keith grabs Lance’s face between his two hands.

“It’s you, you massive idiot!” Keith lunges forwards and roughly connects their lips. Lance makes a noise of surprise, and Keith pulls away.

“Sorry. I probably should have asked.” Lance looks confused.

“Wait me? Like, me? Are you sure?”

“Oh my god. Yes Lance, you.”

“Great. Sweet. Nice. Uhh. So. Does this mean I can kiss you again? Cause you kinda took me by surprise back there.” It’s Keith’s turn to be surprised, blinking owlishly up at Lance who is now standing up, barely inches away from his face. Keith nods slowly.

Their lips meet once more, and this time they both kiss back, gently at first but gradually more. When they pull away panting, Lance looks up and smiles.

“So…” Lance starts.

“So.” Keith says, grinning.

**Author's Note:**

> lmao keith is so oblivious to Lance’s flaming bisexuality. Of course, the team knew Keith was gay literally the day they found the ship. My boy is so obvious.


End file.
